Raised Well-Adjusted Children – 1

Many parents in the 90s encourage self-reliance and responsibility in their children as a way of life and also out of necessity. In more and more families, both parents go to work, and children are quite often left at home during certain hours of the day with only a maid or yaya in the house to care for them.

Learning self—reliance early in life—such as dressing up by himself or doing his homework on his own—prepares your child to become a more responsible and successful adult. He gains self-confidence and a sense of responsibility. He will be better equipped to adjust quickly to a new environment.

But how do you provide your child with the skills necessary for him to become successful and well-adjusted?

The first mistake most parents make is to rush their child into learning. Teach him one skill at a time. You are grapping with a mind and vocabulary much more limited than yours. Remember that a seven—year—old will learn things and concepts much faster than, say, a two—year—old.

Between the ages of 4 to 5, the child must be taught to do the following for himself; use the toilet, bathe, dress up, use a spoon and fork, eat and drink, comb his hair, brush his teeth, wash or wipe his face and keep himself clean. These are best taught through actual demonstration and good example. If your child saw you doing these things naturally as part of your daily routine, it would be easy for him to adopt them. As long as he makes progress, you must not fret and fuss.

But generous with praise when the child masters a skill. This will encourage him and make the learning process easier for you both.

Master the Art of the Happy Ending

Farewell are a meaningful part of all friendships, new and old. They can strengthen a relationship and add depth to our feelings. Here are five ways to practice the good-bye.

Stay with the Moment. Whether it’s a one-or 15-minute process, parting requires that we pay attention. Don’t worry about logistics-baggage, tickets, keys-just focus on the here and now of separating.

Give Tokens. In the past, one would give a good-luck charm to friends setting out on a long journey. Continue this tradition by giving a small personal gift to a friend on her way out: a box of miniature soaps, a CD you think she’ll enjoy, that pair of earrings she once admired on you.

Take a Mental Picture. Taking group pictures just before friends go on their way is a silly custom, but it fulfills an important functions: memorializing the encounter and giving it a tangible place in time. You don’t have to take a photograph-absorb the scene and remember it.

Accept the Sadness and the Relief. Don’t deny what you feel, whatever it is: Good-byes are always tinged with a sense of sadness—and happiness. The brief loneliness you experience when a friend departs is prelude to the joyful realization that you can return to your life, free of interruptions.

Don’t Look Back. Be the one who signals that it’s time to move on. Take the responsibility to close the door, turn the key in the ignition, or walk away. By doing so, you will help everyone realize that what lies ahead is the next adventure.